Ammas-House.com

“Let God be magnified, who has pleasure in the prosperity of His servants” (Psalm 35:27b).

“I call heaven and earth to witness this day against you that I have set before you life and death, the blessings and the curses; therefore choose life, that you and your descendants may live” (Deuteronomy 30:19)

Some friends of mine have a refrigerator that has a timer in the door.  If you open the refrigerator, and it stays open for a preprogramed amount of time and then closes—it will not open again for a preprogramed amount of time.

The manufacturer added this feature in order to keep the food from spoiling.  It allows the refrigerator to reach a desired temperature before it is opened again.

 Let’s say that you just bought  one of these  refrigerators, but you did not know about this feature, and when you attempted to reopen the door right after it shut, you found it would not budge so you grab a nearby tool and begin to leverage all your strength to pry it open—what do you think would happen?

I can tell you what I think . . .

I think the door would be ruined, or at the very least,  I think that the seal around the door would be ruined, and you would have the aggravation and expense of replacing it.

So, what could you have done to avoid this calamity and expense? 

Well, you could have read the instruction book that came with the refrigerator.  In the instructions you would have learned about this feature and even realized its value.  You would then have adapted your habits to accommodate the feature because it is a good thing.

Now, let’s say that on a personal level you have chosen a lifestyle with regard to alcohol. You have made a decision that drinking is not harmful, and you believe it is even a good choice of ways socialize and to relax in the evening.

Let’s say that you choose to live this lifestyle for many years, and then one day you see your children living the same lifestyle, only they are in a different body with different chemical reactions to yours.

You have believed that you were getting away with drinking and with choosing to believe there were no lasting effects, but when you observe your prodigy doing it—you realize it is not the same for them.

Soon, the drinking leads to lifestyle changes and problems for them.  It is around this time that you purpose to quit the habit and begin to preach abstinence to them– but they will not listen.

The years of watching you drink and watching you use alcohol to change your mood have had a dramatic effect on them, and they are now following your example.

 So, what could you have done to avoid this calamity and expense?

Well, you could have read the Book that came with your life.  It is the same one that came with the lives of your children.  It is called the Holy Bible.

You would have then learned in Ephesians chapter five—especially verses 18 and 19— that God does indeed want you drunk—but not with wine.  God wants you drunk with the Holy Spirit.

Choosing to be drunk on the Holy Spirit today,  will one day see your children drunk too!  They will be drunk with the Holy Spirit–not with strong drink that rages; not with wine–which is a mocker, and they will not be one of those who are deceived by it;  for it is not wisdom. (Proverbs 20:1)

1Corinthians 10:23-33

Tagged with: believe • Bible • calamity • Ephesians • Holy Spirit • wisdom

Filed under: choosing

I have been spending a lot of time trying to construct a post about a subject that is difficult for me.  I have looked up keywords and tried to break it down into categories.  I have read blogs about how to write your posts so they rank better, and-on-and-on . . .

Then, when I wasn’t even ready–as though I ever could be–I lost a dear friend of almost eighteen years, and I had to drop my structured post and tell you, my internet friends and readers about another loss.

His name was Shadrach–Shaddi for short!   He was a Westie (West Highland Terrior), and if Shaddi and I had a funeral on the same day–more people would come to his than to mine.  Everyone loved him.

He came into my life about 7pm on Christmas Eve, 1994.  My girls and their families were over for dinner and our traditional Christmas celebration.  We were all so busy that I did not even realize the girls were not right there in the middle of everything until the doorbell rang.

I went to the door, and there they were–all three of them–with the cutest little, white puppy in a big, red stocking, and he had a red bow tied around his neck.  My adult daughters looked, for all the world, like three little girls again.  They were so tickled with themselves for pulling off their surprise with great success!

Later, I learned that my new puppy had been lodged at the neighbors until the time came for him to make his happy appearance.

It was definitely the beginning of a wonderful relationship.  I had not been an empty nester for that long, and I had no clue that I even wanted a dog, but my baby girls made that decision for me, and it turned out to be such a blessing.

My heart hurts.  There has been so much loss in my family this summer, and now this one that hits home right where I live every day.

Yesterday, I got up and went through our routine (Shaddi’s and mine), and by noon we were at the vet’s office.  Everything went very fast, and by 3pm I was home–alone.

This morning, I got up and tried to think about what to do.  I made coffee and puttered around some–but nothing is the same.  Living alone is something I thought I had grown used to, but I wasn’t really living alone–and I didn’t get it until this morning.  Now, I get it.

I have gotten flowers and hugs today, and I have lots of special messages on Facebook, but I have to keep moving ahead–making decisions about what life is going to be like now.

Shaddi used to follow me around continuously.  I would take it for a while, and then I would make him go and lay down in his bed–telling him that was “enough!”

Today, when I was praying about all this, I heard an inner voice I now believe was the Lord because what I heard was, “ShariLee, I want you to start following me around–just like Shaddi followed you around–only I will never tell you that it is ‘enough!’”

Shaddi–10/1993 ~ 08/2011

Filed under: dealing with loss

        Have you ever been a scapegoat?   A person who is made to  bear the blame for others is called a scapegoat, according to wiki.answers.com,  just to name one source.

It can be common in families for one person to be forced into this role, while others in the family learn to expect them to not only take the blame but the punishment as well.   It is rather ironic to note that the original scapegoat was chosen by drawing lots between two goats, one of which became a sacrifice on the alter, and the other –after the people’s sins were laid on its head–took all the blame and was led  into the wilderness where it would surely die–thereby, symbolically, taking the punishment for them as well.

When one person, who refuses to face the responsibility for their own actions, successfully funnels the blame onto another person–he or she has had to do a lot of control and manipulation techniques in order to accomplish this result.  After a while, others in the group or family begin to recognize the scapegoat person as the automatic guilty party, and eventually they find it convenient to move all the blame from themselves and follow suit  with their own guilt.

Belief is a choice, and once a scapegoat believes the lie that they are unworthy and deserving of the scorn heaped upon them–they become an easy target in almost all areas of life.  They become an enemy to themselves emitting vulnerability and a victim mentality.

The pain of rejection leads to conclusions of worthlessness and eventually to actually being thrown away by your own family.

 The target feels wrongly persecuted and receives misplaced vilification, blame and criticism; he is likely to suffer rejection from those who the perpetrator seeks to influence. Scapegoating has a wide range of focus: from “approved” enemies of very large groups of people down to the scapegoating of individuals by other individuals. Distortion is always a feature.

This has happened because she has believed the lie that she is lacking, and she has behaved accordingly, which makes her an all-too easy target.

Until the scapegoat is able to extricate herself from the lie that she is inherently bad, guilty and wrong, she will struggle. She will attract the wrong people, she will fail to reach her potential, and she will be her own worst enemy. The degree to which she is able to realize that she is mistreated not because she is inherently inferior, but because she is sending messages of vulnerability, is the degree to which she will determine the quality of her future.I AM MY OWN AUTHORITY
Anonymous

I must give myself the right to be me ­ to function as I see fit. It is impossible to have a sound self-concept until I am true to myself and accept full responsibility for my own individual life, my own need fulfillment. At any instant I can start a new life.

I ALLOW MYSELF THE FREEDOM; ­ I DEMAND OF MYSELF THE RIGHT:

To recognize myself as the most important and interesting person in the world ­ a unique and precious part of life.

To feel warm and happy, kind and living toward myself.

To realize that at my divine center I am no better or worse, or more or less important, than anyone else in the entire world.

To be different, to make mistakes, to be “wrong,” to be inadequate.

To take the time and effort to fulfill my own needs.

To be happy and free ­ to be harmonious and effective ­ to succeed.

To be open and kind, loving and lovable ­ compassionate and helpful.

To be keenly sensitive and aware ­ radiantly healthy and energetic.

To do less than perfect ­ to be inefficient, to procrastinate, to “goof off,” to kill time.

To perceive myself as an absolute “nothing” ­ unworthy and unneeded.

To have “unacceptable” thoughts, images, desire and experiences.

To allow others to make mistakes, to be “wrong” ­ to be ignorant, to be “screwed-up.”

To act spontaneously, to resist, to change my mind, to be stubborn.

To be emotional ­ to love, to cry, to be angry, to be selfish and uncaring.

To drop all masks and images ­ to not fulfill other’s expectations and images of me.

To be criticized condemned, disapproved, disliked and unwanted.

To fail and to learn from it.

To be loyal, courageous, and exceptional ­ in both my person and my work.

To accept my own authority ­ to follow my own “knowing.”

I allow myself complete freedom and I recognize that I am inescapably responsible for all my decisions and actions. For I must inevitably pay the price incurred. I profit or suffer, learn and grow according to the “nature and consequences” of my act. I realize that “good and evil,” right and wrong,” are but intellectual concepts, for there is only wisdom and unwisdom, only wise and unwise acts.

Therefore, prior to serious decisions I ask myself, “Is this act wise? (i.e., will it injure myself or others ­ will it contribute to my basic needs ­ is it in alignment with the laws and forces of life?) What is the total price involved? Can I afford to pay it? And, am I willing to accept the consequences?”

I know that in the final analysis I need answer only to myself and that I have all the time there is for my total unfoldment ­ that at worst I can only postpone my ultimate reunion with the Infinite. However, wisdom and love, freedom and joy beckon me onward and I choose to proceed as rapidly as my prevailing perception and wisdom allow.”

subconscious beliefs and fears lead to procrastination, self-sabotage, resistance, stress, anxiety, and physical pain… all of which sap the fun from the work and drain our vitality.

Tagged with: BLAME • mistakes • needs • rejection • scapegoat

Filed under: dealing with loss

               My heart is still hurting today.  Things still seem out of control around me, and there is not one, single thing I can do to either affect or effect the circumstances.

               My spirit feels like I am  moving, through the time that is now, like a feather floating on the air that would blow me where it wills; and my body feels like it will explode if I don’t do something–so I am writing to you to let you know you are not alone in this place called, “life.”

God has our back; He is our defense; He is our Rock; He is our Shield; He is our Fortress; He is with us; He is on our side; so I, for one, will not be afraid of the terror by night–the arrow that flies by day–the pestilence that walks in darkness–nor the  destruction that wastes at noonday.

If God is for me–who, or what, could ever be against me?  Nothing can separate us from the Love of God–NO  THING.  He is all we need.

Sometimes it is all we can do–by doing nothing!  So, instead of trying to do something–I have decided something:  “God said it.  I believe it.  That settles it!

Filed under: dealing with loss

           When circumstances come at you in droves, it can
feel like you  are in pieces.  Sometimes you just cut and run;  at
other   times–you are frozen and have no idea what to do;
sometimes you want to hide and sometimes you want to tell anyone
who is willing to listen.

I have been feeling a combination of these things and thinking a lot about how we have to go on after loved ones die.   We have no choice.

We never forget them because they are very much a part of who we are, and their impact is never greater than when they are gone–beyond reach.  For where a testament is, there must also of necessity be the death of the testator.  For a testament is of force after men are dead: otherwise it is of no strength at all while the testator liveth. Whereupon neither the first testament was dedicated without blood. Hebrews 9:16-18.  Yes.  The blood of Jesus was the first testament to us all.

I can no longer call my Aunt to see how she is doing, or think of something funny–call her–and share my joke.  I can no longer spend time-and-time looking for the perfect card or arranging for balloons to be sent, and it is an acute hurt right smack in the middle of my heart each time I visit the thoughts.

I have other loved ones I can reach though, and there can only be one thought at a time in my head–so I am choosing to think about them.  I am choosing to study the Word and find special scriptures I can pray for my sister; focus on ways I can encourage her.  I know that there is a special part of me that has been groomed by observing the joy of living, the kindness of giving and the deep, loving friendship I always saw in my aunt’s life.

She too endured a lot of loss along the way–but she was always SO MUCH FUN!  We are  following your example Aunt Dee.  Thank you.

Filed under: moving on

       This has been a sad week.  My favorite aunt left for Heaven; another family member died, and my precious sister is in the hospital with a terrible battle to fight.  My dear friend’s daughter has cancer–again–and an adopted nephew is in trouble too–and very lost.

This is one of those times when I want to cry out, “STOP!  I want all this tragic stuff to just stop, and go away.”  But we are well aware that, in this world, we WILL have tribulations.  “These things I have spoken unto you, that in me ye might have peace. In the world ye shall have tribulation: but be of good cheer; I have overcome the world.“  John 16:33 

Continued in Part 2 – Moving on with life  . . .

Filed under: dealing with loss